| Loki | |
 | |
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Loki upon receiving the dreaded ballshot | |
| Real Name: | Loki Laufeyson |
| AKA: | God of Mischief |
| Alignment: | Evil |
| Affiliation: | Loki fights for Loki |
| Relatives: | Thor Odinson (adoptive brother) Odin Borson (adoptive father) |
| Gender: | Male |
| Unusual Features: | Horns |
| Occupation: | Being emo |
| Education: | Prep school |
| Species: | Asgardian |
| Home: | Asgard |
| Likes: | His Horns, Horniness |
| Dislikes: | Thor |
| Universe: | Earth One |
| Quotes - Gallery - Appearances | |
| “ | I am a god you dull creature, and I will not be bullied by... | ” |
–Loki's last words before his royal beatdown. | ||
Loki Laufeyson is an Asgardian god and the adoptive son of Odin. He is most well known for embarking on a brave and noble quest to unite the nine realms and rescue them from the treacherous swine that is Odin and his disgusting daughter Thor. Unfortunately, nobody else sees it this way and everyone keeps beating the crap out of poor Loki. He also runs a small joke shop on W. 50th Street called Thor is Dumb.
Powers and Abilities[]
Powers[]
- Asgardian Strength: Loki is part giant and part god, so he's really strong. He can even lift the weight of his own crippling insecurities.
- Invulnerability: Being a god, Loki thinks it's kinda cute when people attack him. He might even smile a bit as he rips out his attackers lungs.
- Healing Factor: Loki can heal wounds at an accelerated rate. He can not, however, heal the hole in his heart. Or his ribcage. Yeah, that's pretty much busted.
- Sorcery: Loki is not only part giant and part god, but he's part witch or something. He can cast spells just like Harry Potter! Expelliarmus! Expecto Patronum! Squiggly Wiggly!
- Shape-Shifting: Loki can shapeshift to look like anyone he wants. Even Taylor Swift.
- Physical Enhancement: Loki can use his spells to enhance his speed and stamina, or to give himself washboard abs. Yeah, mostly the abs thing.
- Telekinesis: Loki can use his fairy princess magic to move objects and people with his mind. He once used this ability with such proficiency, he was able to put on a shot for shot reenactment of The Wizard of Oz using human puppets.
- Teleportation: Loki can transport himself and others anywhere in time and space. He can even travel across dimensions because Speed Force or something.
- Power Bestowal: Loki has the ability to grant abilities to others. He can even grant abilities to inanimate objects. He usually just does this to make them sing and dance.
- Energy Projection: He can also shoot lasers, because why not?
Abilities[]
- Intelligence: Loki is the family nerd. This is why he is shunned and why Thor is better than him. He is constantly coming up with intricate plots to eliminate Thor. Thor then punches these plots and they become dead.
Weaknesses[]
- Inferiority Complex: Loki is an emo dweeb that has little understanding of the world around him. He wallows in self-pity and cries himself to sleep. It doesn't help that Thor is always beating the crap out of him.
  Thor shall smiteth thee! |