I do not like this so called Earth.

Real Name: Thor Odinson
AKA: The God of Thunder
Alignment: Good
Affiliation: Asgard
Relatives: Odin Borson (father)
Gaea (mother)
Frigga (adoptive mother)
Loki Laufeyson (adoptive brother)
Gender: Male
Unusual Features: Chris Hemsworth's Body
Occupation: God of Thunder
Education: A Thousand Years of Norse Warrior Training
Species: Asgardian
Home: Asgard
Likes: This drink
Dislikes: Loki
Quotes - Gallery - Appearances

Stop! Hammer time!

–Thor's first words, bellowed across the world upon his birth.

Thor is the Norse god of thunder and the heir to the Asgardian throne. His father, Odin, is the most powerful of all the gods. Thor's job is to sit back and party with some babes while Odin does all of the work. When Odin dies, Thor will take over Asgard as king.



Thor was born upon the tallest mountain in all of Norway. Upon his birth, he summoned his hammer Mjolnir, and summoned a great and terrible storm that destroyed everything. He was put in time out for two whole hours before he was allowed to play with thunder again.


After training on Asgard for a thousand years, Thor did something really stupid that made Odin banish him. Nobody knows what exactly Thor did. Not even Odin. But he probably did something stupid, so he was banished to Midgard for ten years. Some say Odin was just doing it to be a jerk. This of course, is not true. Odin is watching us!

Powers and AbilitiesEdit


  • Superhuman Strength: Thor is incredibly strong, even for an Asgardian god. He's so strong, he can smash cities and destroy empires. He can even carry your mom, so watch out for Thor.
  • Invulnerability: Thor is unstoppable. He's basically Superman without all of the boy scout stuff. You could drop a planet on Thor, and he would just bellow a hearty laugh as he ripped your trachea from your bloody corpse.
  • Superhuman Speed: Being the tough guy that Thor is, he always finishes really fast. Even faster than you.
  • Super Senses: Thor can hear people from across the planet. By some weird coincidence, it only works if said person is an attractive female.
  • Healing Factor: Thor does not actually have a healing factor, but he thinks Wolverine is cool.
  • Flight: Thor, being the god of thunder, can naturally fly unsupported. The only problem is that he can not control his flight without the aid of his magic hammer. This has caused accidents such as the 542nd and 895th destruction of New York City.
  • Energy Manipulation: As the god of thunder, Thor can throw thunder. Of course, just throwing a sound isn't that impressive, so he can throw lightning too. This lightning has been shown to consist of electricity and it generally strikes somewhere once used.
  • Godblast: Because Thor isn't powerful enough already, Thor can use the Godblast. This deadly move allows him to channel the power of every comic book nerd ever into one super-powerful blast. The Godblast has been shown to destroy planets and gods alike.



An ad for Thoréal

  • Thor's might is matched by no god except for Odin himself. This has led Thor to become a spoiled little brat that does whatever he wants.
  • Thor is most well known for being the god of thunder, but he is also the god of lightning, strength, war, and loud noises (which scare Thor, ironically enough).
  • Thor briefly had his own line of hair products called Thoréal.